Book Review: Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brené Brown
Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brené Brown
Publisher: Avery
Publication Date: September 11, 2012
My rating: 3 of 5 stars
Publisher’s Description:
Every day we experience the uncertainty, risks, and emotional exposure that define what it means to be vulnerable or to dare greatly. Based on twelve years of pioneering research, Brené Brown PhD, MSW, dispels the cultural myth that vulnerability is weakness and argues that it is, in truth, our most accurate measure of courage.
Brown explains how vulnerability is both the core of difficult emotions like fear, grief, and disappointment, and the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, empathy, innovation, and creativity. She writes: “When we shut ourselves off from vulnerability, we distance ourselves from the experiences that bring purpose and meaning to our lives.”
Daring Greatly is not about winning or losing. It’s about courage. In a world where “never enough” dominates and feeling afraid has become second nature, vulnerability is subversive. Uncomfortable. It’s even a little dangerous at times. And, without question, putting ourselves out there means there’s a far greater risk of getting criticized or feeling hurt. But when we step back and examine our lives, we will find that nothing is as uncomfortable, dangerous, and hurtful as standing on the outside of our lives looking in and wondering what it would be like if we had the courage to step into the arena—whether it’s a new relationship, an important meeting, the creative process, or a difficult family conversation. Daring Greatly is a practice and a powerful new vision for letting ourselves be seen.
I think you’re either a person that reads self-help books and gets something out of them or you’re not. I usually do not. I fully admit that I’m not a very introspective person and I’m sure that’s why. It’s definitely not because I think I’m perfect or anything. I remember feeling left out in college when my friends were “finding themselves” and having deep conversations about the meaning of life. I told my mom about it and she said, “Well, not everyone can sit around analyzing themselves all day or nothing would ever get done.” Hmm…wonder where I get it from?
The theme of Daring Greatly is that we should dare to be vulnerable and that there is a difference between shame and guilt. Shame is bad and guilt is not. Also, there is a difference between being vulnerable and just vomiting up your problems to anyone who will listen. Your vulnerability has to have appropriate boundaries.
I don’t disagree with anything Brown is saying, I’m just not sure how to put it to use in my real life. To me, being vulnerable is being open about your insecurities. But how do you express that without sounding like a whiner? I need concrete examples. I looked up my review of Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth, another self-helpish book I’ve read and that’s the same thing I said about that book!
Daring Greatly did lead to a really good discussion in my book club – one of the best we’ve had. I think that’s because we are all pretty close friends and we were able to be vulnerable with each other while discussing this book. I’m not sure it would as good of a discussion if the book club members were just acquaintances.
I know there are tons of people who worship Brené Brown, a lot of my friends included. I can see why but at the same time, I don’t see myself reading any more of her books.
