Crack is Wack

Cash, worried: "Mommy, my penis is cracking."
Me, skeptical: "Are you sure?"
Cash: "Yes, look it's turning black right there."
Me: "Sweetie, that's a blood vessel."
Cash, relieved and excited: "My penis has blood vessels?! Does my bottom have blood vessels too?"
Me, sighing: "Yes, sweetie. Yes it does."